Taming the Tongue

Posted by expedition44 on May 15, 2026

This is a followup article to my good friend Paul’s at Cross and Cornerstone…

Great article! READ HERE: Taming the Tongue

Words That Build Kingdoms or Burn Them Down

Few things have fractured churches, damaged families, divided friendships, and undermined kingdom community more profoundly than the misuse of words. Entire relationships can be unraveled by a sentence. Trust built over years may collapse through gossip whispered in moments. Communities formed in covenant can suddenly become strained under the subtle poison of criticism, slander, accusation, or careless speech. Scripture consistently presents the tongue not as a secondary issue of spiritual maturity but as a central diagnostic of discipleship itself. The biblical witness repeatedly suggests that what exits the mouth often reveals realities deeply embedded within the heart.

We live in an age saturated with speech. Through social media, podcasts, texting, digital communities, and twenty-four-hour outrage cycles, humanity speaks more than any generation in history. Yet increased communication has not necessarily produced increased wisdom. If anything, the digital age has amplified what the apostle James warned against nearly two thousand years ago: the destructive power of an untamed tongue. Many believers have learned how to articulate theological positions, defend doctrinal tribes, and speak confidently about spiritual matters while simultaneously neglecting the deeper kingdom ethic of speech rooted in humility, gentleness, covenant faithfulness, and wisdom from above.

For the biblical writers, speech was never merely descriptive. Words were formative and relational not transactional. They shaped reality, cultivated covenant, reinforced identity, and carried spiritual consequence. This reality becomes even more striking when viewed through an Ancient Near Eastern and Hebraic lens. Within the world of the Hebrew Bible, speech was not considered cheap, casual, or disposable. Words possessed power because they flowed from the character and intentions of the speaker. A promise spoken established covenant. A blessing spoken carried generational implications. A curse uttered represented rupture and judgment. Speech was deeply connected to moral responsibility and communal flourishing.¹

This framework helps us understand why James devotes such serious attention to the tongue. James 3 is not simply moral advice about avoiding profanity or trying harder to “be nice.” Rather, James draws deeply from Jewish wisdom traditions, Proverbs, covenant ethics, and the teachings of Jesus to articulate something far more profound: the tongue functions as a spiritual barometer of kingdom maturity. One may profess theological orthodoxy, participate in worship gatherings, or possess extensive biblical knowledge, yet an untamed mouth exposes a heart still undergoing formation. James therefore confronts believers with uncomfortable honesty: maturity is inseparable from speech.

Speech in the Ancient Near Eastern Imagination

To appreciate the gravity of James’s warning, we must first understand the ancient worldview surrounding speech. In many Ancient Near Eastern cultures, spoken words were perceived as powerful extensions of authority and identity. While Israel’s worldview remained distinct from surrounding nations, the broader cultural context nevertheless recognized language as carrying performative force. Kings issued decrees that established legal realities. Priests invoked blessings believed to mediate divine favor. Oaths created binding obligations, and public declarations could reshape communal standing.²

The Hebrew Scriptures amplify this understanding through the doctrine of creation itself. The opening chapter of Genesis repeatedly emphasizes that God creates through speech: “And God said…” (Gen 1:3). Creation emerges not through violence, chaos, or divine combat—as was common in neighboring ANE myths—but through ordered, intentional divine utterance. God speaks, and reality responds. Walter Brueggemann notes that in Israel’s imagination, Yahweh’s speech is never empty rhetoric but effective action that creates and sustains covenantal order.³ Words, therefore, participate in the movement from chaos to flourishing.

This theological backdrop matters profoundly. Humanity, created in the imago Dei, reflects the Creator’s nature. If God creates through speech, human beings likewise participate in either creative or destructive realities through their own words. Speech can cultivate peace or sow chaos. It can encourage covenant faithfulness or fracture communal trust. Proverbs recognizes this tension repeatedly: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Prov 18:21). Such language is not poetic exaggeration. It reflects a worldview in which speech possesses formative force.

Hebrew itself reveals the interconnectedness of speech and action. The Hebrew word dābār (דָּבָר) may be translated as “word,” “matter,” “thing,” or “event.”⁴ Unlike modern Western distinctions separating speech from action, biblical Hebrew often understands spoken words as events that produce consequence. What is spoken enters reality.

A careless word does not simply disappear into abstraction. It enters relationships, communities, and spiritual environments carrying tangible effects.

This perspective should already challenge modern assumptions. Contemporary culture often minimizes speech under the banner of emotional reaction or personal authenticity: I was angry. I was venting. I was simply being honest. Yet biblical theology repeatedly frames speech as moral responsibility. Honesty devoid of wisdom becomes brutality. Truth without gentleness becomes violence. Correction absent humility often deteriorates into self-righteousness. James inherits this Hebraic imagination. He understands speech not as incidental but central to covenant living. The tongue, though physically small, possesses disproportionate influence because it reveals and shapes spiritual reality simultaneously.

Lashon Hara: Evil Speech and Covenant Breakdown

Perhaps one of the most illuminating Jewish concepts for understanding James 3 is the Hebrew phrase lashon hara (לָשׁוֹן הָרַע), literally meaning “evil tongue” or “evil speech.” While the precise phrase emerges later within rabbinic tradition, its theological foundations are deeply rooted in Scripture.⁵ At its core, lashon hara refers to speech that harms another person—even when the information spoken may technically be true. This distinction is vital. Biblical ethics does not merely condemn falsehood; it also challenges destructive truth-telling detached from love, restoration, or covenant responsibility. One may speak factual words and still participate in sin if those words unnecessarily shame, divide, humiliate, or fracture relationships. The issue is not only factual accuracy but covenantal purpose. The story of Miriam in Numbers 12 offers a striking example. Miriam and Aaron criticize Moses, ostensibly raising concerns about leadership and marriage. Yet Yahweh interprets their speech as rebellion against covenant order. Miriam is subsequently struck with leprosy, signaling the seriousness of destructive speech within the covenant community.⁶ Jewish interpreters later understood this narrative as foundational to teachings regarding slander, gossip, and careless criticism. Similarly, Psalm 34 exhorts believers: “Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit” (Ps 34:13). Proverbs consistently warns against gossip (nirgan), slander, quarrelsome speech, and reckless words that pierce “like a sword” (Prov 12:18). Wisdom literature understands language as either healing balm or corrosive poison.

Importantly, biblical warnings concerning speech frequently emerge within covenant settings. The greatest damage rarely comes from enemies outside the community but from harmful speech among brothers and sisters walking together. Communities built upon trust are uniquely vulnerable to the wounds of words. Churches fracture. Friendships dissolve. Ministry teams splinter. Entire spiritual environments become shaped by cynicism, suspicion, or unresolved offense. James recognizes this danger. He writes not to pagan outsiders but to believers scattered among the nations. His concern centers upon the moral integrity of kingdom communities struggling to embody the ethics of Jesus in a fractured world.

James 3 and the Jewish Wisdom Tradition

James’s treatment of the tongue reaches its theological climax in James 3:1–12, a passage deeply saturated with Hebraic wisdom categories. Far too often, modern readers approach James as though he were merely offering practical self-help advice for Christian living. Yet James reads far more like Israel’s wisdom literature than contemporary moral instruction. Scholars frequently describe the epistle as “New Testament Proverbs” because of its emphasis upon embodied righteousness, covenant integrity, and ethical maturity.⁷ James is not interested in abstract theology detached from daily practice. Faithfulness must become visible.

He begins with a sobering warning directed toward teachers: “Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, because you know that we will receive a stricter judgment” (Jas 3:1). This opening is hardly accidental. Teachers operate primarily through speech. They shape imaginations, frame theological realities, influence discipleship, and direct communities. Consequently, the misuse of words becomes especially dangerous when carried by positions of spiritual authority. Craig Blomberg observes that James recognizes how destructive speech often increases proportionally with influence.⁸ Leadership magnifies consequences.

This warning should strike contemporary ministry culture with unusual force. Churches often emphasize charisma, gifted communication, or platform influence while neglecting deeper questions regarding speech ethics. One may preach eloquently while simultaneously damaging people through sarcasm, divisiveness, unnecessary criticism, or relational manipulation. James refuses to separate giftedness from character. The mature teacher is recognizable not simply by doctrinal precision but by disciplined speech rooted in wisdom.

James continues: “If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is mature” (Jas 3:2). The Greek term teleios (τέλειος) carries the idea of completeness, maturity, or wholeness rather than sinless perfection.⁹ James’s argument is striking: spiritual maturity becomes visible through the disciplining of speech. One cannot meaningfully claim formation into the image of Christ while consistently leaving relational destruction in the wake of one’s words. The apostle then unfolds a series of vivid metaphors. First comes the horse’s bit. Though small, it directs an animal of immense strength (Jas 3:3). Then comes the ship’s rudder, tiny in comparison to the vessel yet decisive in direction (3:4). James’s logic becomes unmistakable: small things often govern large outcomes. The tongue may seem insignificant, yet it steers relationships, ministries, reputations, marriages, churches, and communities. Perhaps his strongest imagery arrives in verse 5: “How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire!” James compares the tongue to wildfire, capable of devastating destruction disproportionate to its size. Anyone who has watched division spread through a congregation understands precisely what James means. A whispered accusation. A careless comment after church. A cynical text thread. A private offense left unchecked. Before long, suspicion spreads like fire through dry brush.

Within an Ancient Near Eastern context, fire imagery carried particular emotional weight. Wildfires threatened crops, livelihoods, and survival itself. Fire symbolized devastation beyond human control. James therefore does not exaggerate. Speech untethered from wisdom becomes spiritually combustible. He intensifies the metaphor further, describing the tongue as “set on fire by Gehenna” (Jas 3:6). Gehenna (γέεννα) evokes the Valley of Hinnom outside Jerusalem, associated with judgment, corruption, and idolatrous rebellion.¹⁰ James’s point is profoundly unsettling: destructive speech may become aligned not with the kingdom of God but with forces opposed to divine flourishing. Words participate in spiritual realities. This helps explain why Scripture speaks so seriously about gossip, slander, and divisive language. Such behavior is not merely personality conflict. It reflects deeper spiritual formation—or deformity. Speech either aligns with the kingdom of heaven or with the chaos opposed to it.

James then introduces one of the most convicting contradictions in all of Scripture: “With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in God’s likeness” (Jas 3:9). Here the covenant problem emerges fully. Humanity bears the divine image (imago Dei).

To curse another image-bearer while worshiping God exposes spiritual incoherence. Worship disconnected from relational integrity becomes hypocrisy.

The Greek term James uses for “curse,” katara (κατάρα), evokes condemnation, denunciation, and destructive speech.¹¹ James is not speaking merely of profanity but of language that tears down, humiliates, or spiritually diminishes another person. This includes gossip masked as concern, theological arrogance disguised as conviction, and criticism baptized as discernment. How often do churches unknowingly sanctify this behavior? Believers sometimes share damaging information under the pretense of prayer. Others justify harshness in the name of “speaking truth.” Yet kingdom truth divorced from kingdom love quickly ceases to resemble Jesus.

James concludes his argument with an image rooted in creation itself: a spring cannot simultaneously produce fresh and bitter water, nor can a fig tree bear olives (Jas 3:11–12). Nature reveals consistency. Fruit corresponds to root. Speech, therefore, functions diagnostically. The mouth reveals what the heart contains. Jesus Himself teaches precisely this principle: “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matt 12:34). Speech is rarely accidental. Under pressure, fatigue, frustration, disappointment, or conflict, the tongue often reveals hidden interior realities we would otherwise prefer to conceal.¹² This does not mean believers never fail in speech. James himself acknowledges universal stumbling. Rather, maturity involves repentance, submission, and increasing awareness that sanctification includes language. Following Jesus requires discipleship of the mouth.

Jesus and the Ethics of Kingdom Speech

Jesus consistently frames speech as revelatory. In Luke 6:45 He declares, “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good… for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” Here speech becomes diagnostic rather than merely behavioral. The problem is not simply loose words but disordered affections. This perspective prevents superficial moralism. Taming the tongue cannot be reduced to behavior modification. One may temporarily restrain words externally while internally cultivating bitterness, envy, resentment, or pride. Eventually, what remains hidden emerges through speech. Jesus therefore addresses roots rather than symptoms.

The Sermon on the Mount intensifies this ethic. Jesus warns against contemptuous speech, equating verbal hostility with deeper heart-level violence (Matt 5:21–22). Kingdom righteousness concerns not only physical action but interior posture. Discipleship transforms speech because discipleship transforms desire. In a culture of outrage, instant reaction, and digital confrontation, Jesus’s words feel especially countercultural. Social media has created unprecedented opportunities for what Scripture consistently warns against: impulsive criticism, public humiliation, tribal hostility, and self-righteous performance. The digital world often rewards sharpness rather than wisdom, reaction rather than discernment, certainty rather than humility. Yet the disciple of Jesus is called into a different imagination.

Paul exhorts believers in Ephesus: “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up” (Eph 4:29). The Greek term translated “corrupting” (sapros) refers to rotten or decaying matter.¹³ Speech may either nourish communal life or introduce decay. Words matter because communities are formed through language.

Kingdom Speech in an Age of Division

Perhaps one of the greatest spiritual challenges facing the modern church is not theological illiteracy but undisciplined speech. We inhabit a moment where outrage masquerades as conviction, harshness is rewarded as courage, and public criticism often receives greater affirmation than quiet faithfulness. Entire ministries have become platforms of perpetual reaction. Communities fracture not always because of major doctrinal failures but because careless words slowly erode trust. The church has not remained immune to this reality. Gossip often hides beneath the language of concern. Slander becomes baptized under the guise of discernment. “I’m just being honest” has become a convenient justification for words never filtered through wisdom, gentleness, or covenant loyalty. Yet honesty absent love frequently becomes brutality, and conviction detached from humility often deteriorates into spiritual arrogance.

This is where the Jewish notion of lashon hara remains remarkably relevant. Evil speech is not simply malicious lying; it includes words that unnecessarily damage another image-bearer, fracture covenant trust, or cultivate division within community. The issue is not merely whether something is factually true, but whether it is spiritually fruitful. Scripture repeatedly presses believers to ask deeper questions: Does this build up? Does this restore? Does this move toward healing? Does this reflect the character of Christ?

To be clear, biblical wisdom does not demand silence in the face of sin, injustice, or necessary correction. Jesus confronted hypocrisy. Paul rebuked error. The prophets spoke boldly against corruption. Yet kingdom correction always differs from fleshly reaction. The goal remains restoration rather than humiliation, healing rather than destruction, reconciliation rather than self-vindication. Even truth can become weaponized when wielded without love.

This distinction matters profoundly in covenant communities. Families, friendships, churches, ministry teams, and discipleship circles all depend upon trust. Once speech becomes corrosive, communities slowly become shaped by suspicion, fear, and fragmentation. A single critical voice can influence entire environments. One divisive conversation can redirect relational dynamics for months or years. James understood this reality well. Small fires spread quickly. It is relatively easy to worship together, serve together, or study Scripture together during seasons of encouragement. The deeper test of discipleship emerges when disappointment enters the room, when misunderstandings occur, when leadership feels imperfect, or when relational friction surfaces. What exits our mouths in those moments reveals much about the condition of our hearts.

The mature disciple learns that spiritual formation includes restraint. Proverbs repeatedly associates wisdom with slowness of speech: “When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent” (Prov 10:19).¹⁴ Silence, at times, becomes spiritual maturity. Not every offense requires response. Not every opinion requires articulation. Not every irritation deserves audience. Likewise, kingdom speech involves intentional encouragement. The New Testament repeatedly frames language positively rather than merely prohibitively. Believers are called to “encourage one another and build one another up” (1 Thess 5:11). The Greek term parakaleō (παρακαλέω) carries ideas of exhortation, comfort, strengthening, and coming alongside.¹⁵ Kingdom speech strengthens weary souls. It restores dignity. It calls out identity. It reminds people who they are in Christ.

One of the tragedies of modern discipleship is how easily criticism multiplies while encouragement remains scarce. We often assume people know they are valued. We presume gratitude is obvious. Yet Scripture continually models blessing as spoken reality. Fathers blessed children. Leaders blessed communities. Jesus blessed disciples. Paul regularly opened letters with affirmation before correction. Kingdom speech names grace before addressing failure. In many ways, the tongue becomes one of the clearest indicators of sanctification. Spiritual maturity is not merely doctrinal precision, charismatic gifting, or ministry effectiveness. According to James, maturity reveals itself through disciplined words flowing from transformed hearts. A believer may possess impressive biblical knowledge and yet remain profoundly immature if speech consistently produces division, cynicism, or destruction.

Conclusion

Perhaps James understood something we desperately need to recover in our generation: the battle of the tongue is never merely about behavior modification. This is not simply about trying harder, being nicer, or learning to avoid saying things we later regret. The deeper issue is discipleship. The tongue reveals allegiance. It exposes formation. It often uncovers what kingdom our hearts are quietly trusting when pressure rises. Scripture consistently presents the mouth as far more than a communication tool. Our words become instruments of agreement. They reveal what we are partnering with internally long before anything manifests externally. Proverbs reminds us that “death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Prov 18:21). Notice, Scripture does not suggest that the tongue itself possesses magical power, as though Christians merely need better motivational slogans or positive confession techniques. Rather, the biblical vision is deeper and more covenantal. Words carry influence because they reveal where trust, fear, hope, and allegiance reside.

This is why Genesis begins with divine speech: “And God said…” Yahweh speaks order into chaos. Creation itself emerges through intentional, life-giving word. Humanity, bearing the divine image, likewise participates in either building or breaking through speech. Our words create atmospheres. They shape relationships. They reinforce faith or deepen fear. They strengthen covenant or slowly erode trust. Jesus understood this clearly when He said, “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matt 12:34). Eventually what fills the heart finds expression through the lips. Fear eventually talks. Cynicism eventually talks. Unforgiveness eventually talks. Bitterness talks. Anxiety talks. But so do hope, peace, trust, faith, gentleness, and encouragement. Our mouths often reveal realities within us that we ourselves have not yet fully acknowledged.

This is why the enemy so often works at the level of exhaustion, disappointment, discouragement, and offense. Spiritually tired people frequently begin speaking beneath their identity. (Hurt people, hurt people.) We start narrating our lives through fear rather than promise, frustration rather than faithfulness, accusation rather than grace. We rehearse despair until it feels normal. We repeatedly speak hopelessness until it becomes expectation. Israel’s wilderness journey offers a sobering picture. Their downfall was not merely the existence of giants in the land but their persistent verbal partnership with fear and unbelief. Murmuring in Scripture is rarely portrayed as innocent frustration. It often reflects a deeper distrust in God’s provision, leadership, or character. The wilderness became as much a battle of speech as a battle of circumstances. The same dynamic exists for us today. The enemy rarely begins by changing behavior; he often begins by shaping agreement. Eden itself reminds us of this reality. “Did God really say…?” The first fracture began with distorted trust in God’s word, and shortly thereafter human speech itself changed. Before the fall there was confidence, openness, authority, and relational alignment. After the fall came blame, fear, hiding, and distortion. Speech revealed the fracture before anything else.

This is why spiritual maturity is deeply connected to governing the tongue. Not because God desires robotic disciples who never wrestle honestly, lament deeply, or feel emotion. Scripture gives us Psalms of grief, confusion, and even holy protest. Yet biblical lament always moves honestly toward God rather than away from Him. David models this repeatedly. Betrayed, exhausted, hunted, and discouraged, he nevertheless declares, “I will bless the Lord at all times” (Ps 34:1). That was not denial. It was trust. It was spiritual resistance against allowing pain to become the loudest narrator in his life. The warfare of the mouth is ultimately the warfare of agreement. Every day we are invited to consider: What story will shape our speech? Will our mouths continually reinforce fear, accusation, offense, and hopelessness? Or will they increasingly come into alignment with the character, promises, and goodness of God?

This does not mean pretending circumstances are easy. It does not mean suppressing grief or avoiding honest struggle. Rather, it means refusing to let pain write our theology. It means learning, slowly and imperfectly, to speak in ways that reflect trust even when life feels uncertain. Because eventually our words reveal something profound: the kingdom we truly believe carries the highest authority. May we become people whose mouths increasingly release blessing instead of bitterness, healing instead of harm, courage instead of fear, and hope instead of despair. May our speech reflect the way of Jesus, and may our covenant communities become marked by words that strengthen, restore, and call one another deeper into the life of the kingdom.

Notes

John H. Walton, Ancient Near Eastern Thought and the Old Testament (Grand Rapids: Baker Academic, 2018), 87
Victor H. Matthews and Don C. Benjamin, Social World of Ancient Israel (Peabody, MA: Hendrickson, 1993), 44
Walter Brueggemann, Theology of the Old Testament (Minneapolis: Fortress, 1997), 122
Willem A. VanGemeren, ed., New International Dictionary of Old Testament Theology and Exegesis, vol. 1 (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1997), 907
Joseph Telushkin, Words That Hurt, Words That Heal (New York: William Morrow, 1996), 43
Dennis T. Olson, Numbers (Louisville: Westminster John Knox, 1996), 75
Scot McKnight, The Letter of James, NICNT (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2011), 31
Craig L. Blomberg and Mariam J. Kamell, James, ZECNT (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2008), 153
Douglas J. Moo, The Letter of James, PNTC (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2000), 148
Craig S. Keener, The IVP Bible Background Commentary: New Testament (Downers Grove, IL: IVP, 2014), 721
Ceslas Spicq, Theological Lexicon of the New Testament, vol. 2 (Peabody, MA: Hendrickson, 1994), 270
Darrell L. Bock, Luke 1:1–9:50, BECNT (Grand Rapids: Baker Academic, 1994), 648
Peter T. O’Brien, The Letter to the Ephesians (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1999), 345
Tremper Longman III, Proverbs (Grand Rapids: Baker Academic, 2006), 241
Ben Witherington III, New Testament Theology and Ethics (Downers Grove, IL: IVP Academic, 2011), 553

The covenant and marriage

Posted by expedition44 on March 8, 2025

The goal of gathering information on this topic is that it might be activated and transformed continually to you. “Do or do not. There is no try” [1] You are a minister of the order of the holy royal priesthood, and your primary congregation is your spouse and family. “Many of the truths that we cling to depend on our point of view.” [2] In a marriage you always think your perspective is correct, yet if you are in a covenant relationship your spouse, your primary covenant relationship is based on the Lord [first]. Therefore, the Holy Spirit is commissioned through your spouse to give you the gift of a divine perspective when you aren’t able to see clearly yourself. There are a lot of repercussions today of the modern church not understanding ancient covenant language that have affected our marriages, family, and the body of Christ. I think we need a return to covenant faithfulness, and it starts with each of us in covenant relationship before the Lord, then to our marriage, families and unto the ends of the earth by discipleship.

“You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power,
for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being.” Revelation 4:11

“In the ultimate sense, your marriage has nothing to do with your spouse. It has everything to do with your relationship to Jesus Christ” (279). [3]

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 states that two are better than one, as they can help each other and share the rewards of their labor. If one falls, the other can lift them up, but woe to the person who is alone when they fall.

Let all that you do be done in love. 1 Corinthians 16:14

Your marriage first has to be grounded individually in the love of Christ and then reflected towards your spouse. The word love in our culture is overworked and overlooked. An overworked word loses its meaning. An overlooked word has no meaning at all.

Love in the OT is a spontaneous feeling which impels to self-giving, to grasping that which causes it, or to pleasurable activity. It involves the inner person. Since it has a sexual basis, it is directed supremely to persons; love for things or acts has a metaphorical aspect. God’s love is correlative to his personal nature, and love for God is love first for his person and only then for his word or law. Yet even in the extended sense love has an element of fervor or passion except in the case of lesser objects. In the secular sphere love is for husband or wife, parents or children, friends, masters, servants, and social groups. This use is more common than the religious use and may thus be taken as the basis of interpretation. [4]

Does this come as a surprise that the Hebrew ahavah and its Greek correlate agape both have sexual roots? Consider for a moment that YHVH uses marriage and adultery as the paradigm examples of covenant relationship with Him. It’s all about intimacy, ecstasy, bliss, jubilation and euphoria. It should be the ultimate metaphor of Joy. Sex is likely the closest slice (or foreshadow) of heaven we will ever get, especially if it is performed in the light that God intended. I give “rapture” theology a hard time, but maybe we have similarly victimized agape by turning it into a set of proxy principles, a way of feeling religious virtue without ever taking off our clothes. Arm’s-length intimacy isn’t found in Scripture. We have learned to view love in an incomplete form, and anything outside of Christ is incomplete.

The primary word for love in Hebrew is ahavah (אַהֲבָה). Ahavah conveys both human and divine love. It appears in a range of contexts, from romantic love (e.g., Jacob’s love for Rachel in Genesis 29:20) to the covenantal love between God and His people (e.g., Deuteronomy 7:7–8). Ahavah emphasizes action and commitment. This is evident in Deuteronomy 6:5: “Love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.” Here, ahavah signifies an all-encompassing devotion rooted in faithfulness and obedience. [5]

Another significant Hebrew term is chesed (חֶסֶד), often translated as “loving-kindness” or “steadfast love.” While not synonymous with ahavah, chesed communicates God’s covenantal loyalty and mercy, such as in Psalm 136, where the refrain declares, “His steadfast love endures forever.”

Together, ahavah and chesed demonstrate a love that is both relational and enduring. [6]

In covenant marriage, this multifaceted understanding of love calls for a life of devotion, selflessness, and community. By living out this love, we participate in the divine mission of bringing healing and reconciliation into our marriage, our families, and through discipleship, to the end of the broken world.

“[It is] a central scriptural teaching…that wherever anything wrong exists in the world, anything we experience as anti-normative, evil, distorted, or sick, there we meet the perversion of God’s good creation. It is one of the unique and distinctive features of the Bible’s teaching on the human situation that all evil and perversity in the world is ultimately the result of humanity’s fall, of its refusal to live according to the good ordinances of God’s creation. Human disobedience and guilt lie in the last analysis at the root of all the troubles on earth.” [7]

Consider now how frequently idolatry and sexual immorality appear in tandem throughout the biblical narrative (see Exodus 32, Isaiah 57:7-8, Hosea 4:12-14, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, Galatians 5:19-21, Ephesians 5:5, Colossians 3:5, Revelation 2:14, 20, 21:25).

“The link between idolatry and sexual immorality is established by the frequent use of ‘prostituting themselves’ or ‘adultery’ to describe Hebrew idolatry [in the Old Testament]. Israel’s unfaithfulness to God was not only a form of spiritual prostitution or adultery, but it also led to the physical acts themselves.” [8]

Sexual sin is merely a symptom of something else. Everything is turned upside down—splintered, deformed, and henceforth, death-dealing to our spirituality. The Greek pornea primary definition is adultery, but it has a secondary meaning of idolatry. It was connected to sexual practices involved in pagan worship. Among pagans, temple prostitutes and group orgies were a reality. The prophets Jeremiah and Ezekiel also employ this metaphor. Jeremiah 3:6-9 describes Israel’s idolatry as harlotry:

“During the reign of King Josiah, the LORD said to me, ‘Have you seen what faithless Israel has done? She has gone up on every high hill and under every green tree to prostitute herself there.’ … ‘Because Israel’s immorality mattered so little to her, she defiled the land and committed adultery with stone and wood.'”

Similarly, Ezekiel 16 and 23 provide graphic depictions of Israel’s idolatry as adulterous behavior, emphasizing the betrayal of the covenant relationship.

The book of James further reinforces this concept by addressing the divided loyalties of believers.

James 4:4 states, “You adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God? Therefore, whoever chooses to be a friend of the world renders himself an enemy of God.”

Here, the language of adultery is used to describe the spiritual unfaithfulness of aligning with worldly values over God’s commandments.

Throughout Scripture, idolatry is depicted as spiritual adultery which serves as a powerful reminder of the exclusive devotion God demands from His people. It highlights the seriousness of idolatry, not merely as a breach of religious practice but as a profound betrayal of the intimate relationship God desires with His followers. [9]

Covenant and replacement Theology

This is not really a post on a particular theology, I don’t really subscribe to much of any boxes to check in that regard, but since you might be wondering, I will expound here briefly. It then becomes very interesting that many scholars would say that God eventually “divorces” Israel for her unfaithfulness paving the way for the New Covenant for all to be grafted into the “body of Christ,” the “church” as the “new” bride of Christ. Although this is the heart of replacement theology and often argued (to may take the simple analogy too far), it is hard to deny that in a basic sense God has severed His relationship with unfaithful Israel and offered it to all who will accept Him. Where “replacement Theology” might be perceived as a bit “off” here is when you come to the realization that God’s plan through the Abrahamic Covenant was to redeem or reconcile all the nations. Israel would simply be that catalyst, and when they failed to follow through in their covenant mission, God simply adapted a plan for “all” to return to Him. However, this is splitting hairs as the plan of covenant relationship was always for those that made a personal decision and were willing to enter into allegiant obedience with Him. The offering simply started with all of Israel being chosen to receive a special favor of redemption through the Exodus to begin that process. to some regard special privilege as a nation was given to Israel as a whole but not to the extent of some magic tractor beam that some have made it out to sound like. The covenant relationship that God offers to anyone, Israel or those under the New Covenant was always prefaced by the need to enter into obedient relationship with Him. In that sense what God was looking for never changed from the former covenants to the New Covenant.

Love in Covenant Relationships

Covenant relationships form the backbone of many biblical narratives, embodying a commitment that goes beyond mere agreements to encompass mutual devotion and loyalty. These relationships, often likened to the bond between God and His people, reflect a profound level of trust and dedication. Within the context of marriage, the covenant relationship symbolizes a lifelong promise, where love is not merely an emotion but a steadfast commitment to uphold the precepts of the Lord as mosaic picture of sacrificial love and the essence of the Love of Jesus towards another. In a covenant relationship, love has always been characterized by unwavering faithfulness.

Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were entreating through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. 2 Corinthians 5:20

God’s covenant relationship with us is a metaphor of marital faithfulness. It’s not just about sexual fidelity but sex has a very big role to play in this metaphor, so much so that idolatry is viewed in sexual terms. We see this again when Paul chooses the Greek term katallasso as the verb about returning to the Lord. Katallasso means “to reconcile,” and is used in 1 Corinthians 7:11 about marriage reconciliation. This Greek verb is the verb for marriage counseling. It is the goal and the means by which estranged couples reunite. And if Paul uses this verb as the actions required of broken marriages, how much more applicable is it when it comes to broken fellowship with the Great Lover His church. Pagans convert. Jews return. This message isn’t just for the married, it is also to those that have lost their covenant. Paul is reaching out to those who were once part of the fellowship but now don’t live like it. This can be seen as directed towards Israel, but also anyone else who has strayed. Their error is divorcing God. They knew God but they chose to live for their own agendas. Perhaps today in our modern religious circles there are a lot more who need to be reconciled than we thought. Perhaps the most important function of the “church” is “divorce counseling” with those who thought marriage to God only meant signing the contract. We have learned to treat this covenant like a contract of the world not a spiritual covenant. I have always had a hard time with evangelical crusades that emphasize the salvific concentration without the follow-up of deeper discipleship. It resembles a one-night stand kind of theology rather than a lifetime of faithful commitment.

For believers, covenant faithfulness involves a response to God’s steadfast love through obedience, worship, and devotion. The call to faithfulness is echoed in 1 Corinthians 4:2, “Now it is required of stewards that they be found faithful.” Christians are encouraged to live in a manner worthy of the calling they have received, reflecting God’s faithfulness in their relationships and commitments. When we fail to live intimately in the covenant that God offers to us it is describes with the same words as adultery and idolatry. In this sense casual Christianity equates with grounds for spiritual divorce. (I never knew you.) Yet God is pictured as a faithful partner that is always asking the unfaithful one to come back into lost devotion.

The Book of Hebrews exhorts believers to hold fast to their hope without wavering, for “He who promised is faithful” (Hebrews 10:23). This assurance of God’s faithfulness provides the foundation for a life of trust and perseverance in the covenant marriage and the Christian journey. That is the heart of the covenant. That we might be completely undivided to this journey of covenant faithfulness to the Lord and then to our spouse, our families, and unto the end of the world to those that are endeared together in this commissional calling. It is a return to Eden and beyond.

SPECIAL THANKS TO Krista Bensheimer and Steve and Kay Cassell who contributed to the article.

Master Yoda – Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back, George Lucas
Master Yoda – Star Wars: Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, George Lucas
Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs. Emerson Eggerichs. Nashville, TN: Nelson, Thomas Inc., 2004.
Kittel, G., Friedrich, G., & Bromiley, G. W. (1985). Theological Dictionary of the New Testament. Grand Rapids, MI: W.B. Eerdmans.
Etymological Dictionary of Biblical Hebrew: Based on the Commentaries of Samson Raphael Hirsch
^IBID
Albert M. Wolters, Creation Regained: Biblical Basics for a Reformational Worldview, p. 46
Dennis P. Hollinger, The Meaning of Sex: Christian Ethics and the Moral Life
https://biblehub.com/topical/i/idolatry_as_spiritual_adultery.htm

Who do you claim as father?

Posted by expedition44 on June 16, 2024

Luke, I am your father! Every 80’s and 90’s guy knows exactly the implications of this phrase. Today we live in a fatherless world. There are so many implications of this, but one of them is the Christian mainstream claiming things of the Lord, yet in actuality is far from the galaxy of their father. I would urge a return to covenant living.

“As for Me, behold, My covenant is with you, and you will be the father of a multitude of nations.” Genesis 17:4 NASB

In Hebrew Av hamon goyim means Abraham would be the father of many, those inside and outside of his immediate family – the regathering of the lost nations (Deuteronomy 32). Today, Christians believe they are faithful to the same God, Yahweh; but if we would have lived during the time this sentiment was expressed to Abraham (the intended audience of the text) I doubt our modern-day actions or fruit would have been recognized as the kind of devotion or allegiance God was asking for. As I write this, Four Southern Baptist theologians and pastors intend to ask messengers to this year’s Southern Baptist Convention annual meeting to adopt the Nicene Creed as part of the denomination’s official faith statement and it begs the question, what does it look like in a modern world to fulfill what Yahweh asked of us?

According to Rabbi Shraga Freedman, “Even when non-Jewish nations recognize the existence of a Supreme Being and the need to serve Him, they advance many distorted notions of what He expects of His creations. Throughout history, their warped perceptions of religious devotion have caused untold pain and suffering to myriads of innocent human beings.”[1]

At first contemplation you might realize that if you aren’t observant to the Torah then you certainly can’t claim Abraham as his spiritual father, and thus what His father Yahweh asked of Him and those to come. You aren’t of the same lineage. But Jesus also redefines a few things for us, and I am thankful for that!

Skip Moen interjects, “God promised that Abraham would become the father of many goyim, that is, the father of many who do not descend from his biological line. But this does not mean these goyim are free to make up their own religious practices. What it means is precisely what James said at the Jerusalem council in the first century. “For from ancient generations Moses has those who preach him in every city, since he is read in the synagogues every Sabbath” (Acts 15:21). We must remember that the promise to Abraham is predicated upon a prior statement, namely, “Walk before Me, and be blameless.” It is hardly conceivable that walking before Abraham’s God is a matter of personal taste.” [2]

I have written a couple of books on the return to covenant practice. That doesn’t mean that all modern Christians should go back to observing the law, but it might carry some implications. I am saying quite clearly that modern day Christianity is a better picture of unfaithfulness than faithfulness. The primary mission of Jesus was to a lost and carnal world to be reconciled back to Yahweh. The religious leaders of His day had become the farthest from His father. I am not sure that has changed any today.

Jesus was observant. This is a call back to being holy, to leave everything on the beach having no other idols before you and completely follow the Lord. Today if you and your family are largely indistinguishable from those of the world you likely aren’t living by the covenant given. The God of Abraham well might be trying to get your attention by calling out your name and urging you to come back into the fold of his love compassion and mercy. Thankfully that calling is from Yahweh and not a “Darth Vader” father figure that has left this world lacking in so many ways. Return to what is TOV.

[1] Rabbi Shraga Freedman, Living Kiddush Hashem, p. 31.

[2] https://skipmoen.com/